AUTHOR’S NOTE: First off, yes this was actually filmed in 1994…badly. We had no budget and no technology, so how good could it be. Also, and I’m going to be very honest, this really, REALLY sucks in places.

Anyway, the script is an adaptation of Star Traks: Sensitivity 101, which is available on the Star Traks Story Page. Those of you who have read Sensitivity 101 will notice that this script has several major differences. This is mainly due to who was available when we were filming.

Also, for any of you interested in screenwriting, please do not use this as a model of correct script format. I had NO training when I wrote this, and it shows.

Okay, I’ve babbled enough. Read on if you dare.

Star Traks

“Refresher Course”

by Alan Decker

FADE IN:

EXT. STARFLEET HEADQUARTERS - DAY

Establishing. We can see only the building.

RYDELL (V.O.) Captain’s Log. Stardate 49864.5. Commander Dillon, Lieutenant Commander Jaroch, Ensign Andrea Carr, and myself have arrived at Starbase 24 by runabout. Jaroch has some kind of scientific conference to attend, but Dillon and I are here for much more urgent reasons.

INT. WAGNER’S OFFICE - DAY

CAPTAIN ALEXANDER RYDELL and COMMANDER TRAVIS DILLON sit across a desk from ADMIRAL WAGNER.

WAGNER I’m sorry, but I just can’t do it.

DILLON But, sir. Regulations state that all ships must have…

WAGNER Would you shut up about the damn regulations, Dillon? You’ve done nothing but quote regulations for the last hour.

RYDELL Admiral Wagner, I hate to agree with Commander Dillon, but we really do need this system upgraded.

WAGNER I wish I could help you, Captain Rydell.

DILLON (whining) But our opening credits suck.

WAGNER There’s just no money in the budget for it. I’m sorry, but you’ll just have to stick with these.

Wagner picks up a remote control off his desk, points it at the camera, and presses the button.

CUT

OPENING CREDITS - Shots of the Secondprize flying by

RYDELL (V.O.) Space…there’s a lot of it out there. These are the voyages of the Starship Secondprize…

DILLON (V.O.) Okay, that’s enough.

RYDELL (V.O.) But I haven’t finished the intro.

DILLON (V.O.) That’s all we can afford. We have to pay you by the word, you know.

RYDELL (V.O.) But Dillon, I….MMMPPH

CUT TO

INT. CORRIDOR - DAY Dillon has jumped on Rydell’s back and has his hand clamped over Rydell’s mouth. The two men struggle, then notice the camera. They stop fighting and wave sheepishly.

DILLON and RYDELL Hi.

CUT TO TITLES

EXT. SPACE

The runabout in flight.

RYDELL (V.O.) Captain’s Log. Stardate 49864.9. After our less than successful meeting with Admiral Wagner, we are returning to the Secondprize. Another twelve hours trapped in a runabout with Dillon’s officiousness, Jaroch’s technobabble, and Carr’s poetry. I am less than thrilled.

INT. RUNABOUT REAR COMPARTMENT.

Commander Dillon, LIEUTENANT COMMANDER JAROCH, and Captain Rydell are seated around a table. Dillon and Jaroch are both reading and completely oblivious to their surroundings. Rydell also has a PADD, but shifts his position frequently. He finally slams the PADD down.

RYDELL Computer, what’s our ETA at the Secondprize?

COMPUTER Approximately, ten point four hours. Five minutes less than the last time you asked.

RYDELL I didn’t ask for the commentary.

He looks at Dillon and Jaroch who have not even looked up from their PADD’s. Dillon looks up.

DILLON Did you need something, sir?

RYDELL Sorry, I’m just bored. What are you reading?

DILLON (excited) It’s the new regulation update from Starfleet. Do you want to…

RYDELL (quickly) That’s O.K.

DILLON You really should look at these. You violate a substantial number of regulations every day.

RYDELL I really don’t care.

DILLON See. Regulation number 1: All senior officers should obey all regulations.

RYDELL Shut up, Dillon.

DILLON Regulation 346. No senior officer should use insulting language at a lower ranking officer.

RYDELL (shouting) DILLON!!! (more calmly) How about you, Jaroch? How was the conference?

JAROCH What? Oh, it was most interesting. Dr. Beckett’s work in remote holographic projection is quite revolutionary. If his system works on a large enough scale, starship captains could go on away missions without leaving the ship and putting themselves in danger. You see, with his system, the brain waves of an away team member, such as the first officer would be used to…

RYDELL I think I’m going to check on Ensign Carr. I bet she could use a break.

He slips out of his chair and EXITS right.

JAROCH Oh. Well, I can explain it to you later.

DILLON I’m still listening.

JAROCH I am very happy for you, sir.

Jaroch picks his PADD back up and continues reading.

INT. RUNABOUT COCKPIT

ENSIGN ANDREA CARR sits at the controls hunched over a PADD. Rydell ENTERS. She does not hear him.

CARR (softly) Pine…no. Wine…nah. Porcupine…no.

(Shouting) ASININE!

RYDELL Excuse me?

Carr is startled. She jumps and flings the PADD backwards.

It slams into Rydell.

CARR (flustered) Captain! Oh, sir, I’m really sorry. I was working on a poem and you scared me and…

RYDELL I’m all right. Just calm down.

CARR O.K. I’m just so sorry. I mean, I don’t want you to court-martial me or…

RYDELL (forcefully) I’m not going to court-martial you. I just was going to relieve you for a while. You can go hang out with the wild and crazy guys in the back.

CARR Wild and crazy guys?

RYDELL Andrea. Just go!

CARR (frightened) Yes, sir.

She gets up and EXITS. He sits and starts looking out the window.

INT. RUNABOUT COCKPIT

Rydell is staring out the window with a glazed expression on his face. He is leaning on his elbows in a complete and total bored stupor.

RYDELL Computer, begin log recording.

COMPUTER Recording.

RYDELL Captain’s log. Stardate 49865.7. I don’t see how Carr can stand doing this as long as she does. I bored out of my skull. Now I know why she writes so much poetry. I’d probably write War and Peace if I was stuck up here all the time. Otherwise, the situation is normal. All systems are…

The console begins to beep. Rydell sits up and quickly checks the console.

RYDELL What the hell is that?

COMPUTER Those are the runabout controls.

RYDELL No! What are the sensors beeping about?

COMPUTER The sensors have detected a temporal anomaly in a nearby asteroid cluster.

RYDELL I didn’t mean for you to tell me. I am perfectly capable of reading the sensors myself.

COMPUTER Then why did you ask?

RYDELL Never mind. Alter course to investigate.

EXT. SPACE

The runabout changes course.

INT. RUNABOUT COCKPIT

Rydell is looking at a blue object on the monitor.

RYDELL This thing is incredible.

COMPUTER There is a build-up of energy occurring in the anomaly.

RYDELL I’m sure everything’s fine.

The cockpit is suddenly filled with a blast of blue light. Rydell screams.

INT. RUNABOUT REAR COMPARTMENT

Dillon, Jaroch, and Carr are seated at the table. Suddenly, the are thrown from their seats as the runabout dives forward. They scramble up and EXIT left.

INT. RUNABOUT COCKPIT

Rydell is seated at the controls screaming. Dillon, Jaroch, and Carr ENTER.

DILLON What’s wrong, sir!

RYDELL I’m going to die! ARRGGH!!!

DILLON Jaroch, quick! Do something!

JAROCH What would you suggest?

DILLON Don’t you Yynsians have a neck pinch or anything?

Jaroch looks at Rydell, shrugs, and hits him over the head. Rydell falls to the ground unconscious.

DILLON Close enough. Find an asteroid to land this thing on, Ensign.

Jaroch and Dillon drag Rydell off.

EXT. SPACE.

The runabout is sitting on an asteroid.

INT. RUNABOUT REAR COMPARTMENT.

Rydell is laying on the table. Jaroch is scanning him with a tricorder as Dillon and Carr look on.

DILLON How is he, Jaroch?

JAROCH Fine as far as I can tell.

Rydell wakes up groggily and looks around.

RYDELL Where am I?

DILLON Oh great! You gave him amnesia!

RYDELL I don’t have amnesia. I know exactly who I am.

JAROCH And who are you?

RYDELL Alexander Rydell. Why are you guys in uniforms?

Jaroch checks his tricorder.

CARR You don’t remember us, Captain?

RYDELL Captain? What is this… Star Trek?

Jaroch injects Rydell with a hypo. Rydell falls unconscious.

DILLON What’d you do that for?!

JAROCH That is not Captain Rydell.

DILLON and CARR Excuse me.

JAROCH The brain waves do not match those of the captain. This is his body, but he’s not in it. Ensign, check the logs and the sensors. We need to know everything that happened while he was in the cockpit.

Carr exits.

DILLON I don’t understand a thing that just happened here.

JAROCH I would be surprised if you did, sir.

DILLON (getting it) Wait. The captain’s mind is not in his body.

JAROCH Your deductive skills never cease to amaze me.

DILLON So, if Captain Rydell’s not in his own body who’s is he in?

INT. DORM ROOM - NIGHT

Darkness.

RYDELL (groggily) Lights.

ANDREA If you insist.

Lights go on. Rydell is lying in bed wearing a robe. Andrea is lying on top of him. Rydell screams.

RYDELL Andrea?

ANDREA What?

RYDELL Oh boy.

INT. RUNABOUT REAR COMPARTMENT.

Jaroch is scanning Rydell’s body as Dillon tries to look over his shoulder.

JAROCH This would be a lot easier if you were not trying to render me unconscious with your breath.

DILLON Sorry.

Carr enters.

CARR According to the logs, Captain Rydell was investigating a temporal anomaly in this asteroid belt. An energy emission from the anomaly struck the runabout enveloping it in a bluish glow. The captain was in contact with the control panel at the time and was enveloped as well.

DILLON What?

JAROCH He was hit by a big blue light.

DILLON So what happened to him?

CARR I don’t know.

JAROCH Well, keep working on it, Ensign.

INT. DORM ROOM - NIGHT

Rydell and Andrea are in the same position as before. Andrea is trying to open Rydell’s robe.

RYDELL (nervously) Andrea, I really don’t think you should be doing this. I mean, I’m your commanding officer.

ANDREA Oh. So your into THOSE games. Well, sir, I’m here to serve.

She goes after his robe again. Rydell squirms out from under her.

RYDELL Hold on! I need to…use the bathroom!

ANDREA I’ve got a condom in my purse if that’s what you’re after. Besides, I’m on the pill.

RYDELL Ahh, no. I’ve really got to go. I’ll be right back.

He slowly exits the room, bumping into things and looking around confused as he goes.

INT. DORM LIVING ROOM - NIGHT

Rydell enters confused. He looks around, then walks over to the window. He opens the blinds revealing the night.

RYDELL Where the hell am I?

ANDREA (O.S.) Alex! Come back to bed, O Captain my Captain.

RYDELL Just a minute.

He grabs a newspaper and looks at it.

RYDELL 1994! What the hell?

ANDREA Alex!

RYDELL O.K.

He puts the paper down and exits.

INT. DORM ROOM - NIGHT

Andrea is on the bed. Rydell enters and walks over to her, but doesn’t lie down.

ANDREA Are you coming?

RYDELL Uhh…well.

ANDREA Well then, I’m coming up to get you.

She leaps up and pulls Rydell’s robe off. A scream is heard. Trina is at the door.

TRINA (very upset) You bastard! How could you?

ANDREA Trina, I…

Trina storms over to them.

TRINA Shut up, you slut! He was mine! How could you come in here and… And how could you let her…

She screams again, slaps Rydell, and runs out.

ANDREA Don’t you people lock the doors around here?

INT. RUNABOUT REAR COMPARTMENT

Jaroch is pacing. Dillon is sitting down watching him. Carr is standing against the wall.

JAROCH In order for the brain waves of this person to be as close to the captain’s as they are, this person must be a relative of the captain.

DILLON Uh huh.

JAROCH Computer, compare subject’s brain waves to all known relatives of Captain Rydell.

COMPUTER Working. No matches found.

CARR How far back do your records go?

COMPUTER The year 2173, old calendar.

JAROCH Computer, what is the probability that this is a relative of Captain Rydell’s?

COMPUTER Ninety-nine point six percent.

DILLON That’s pretty high.

JAROCH Commander Dillon, you really should have become a scientist.

CARR Wait a second! That energy wave came from a time distortion. Maybe, we should scan it for the captain.

JAROCH I do not remember giving you permission to figure anything out.

CARR Sorry, but this might not be a relative at all. Maybe he just got sucked into a parallel universe or something.

JAROCH Just sent to another universe. Somehow that does not brighten my spirits, Ensign.

CARR I’ll just go do that scan now.

She exits.

DILLON So what do we do if she finds him?

JAROCH Well, if we lock onto his brain waves, I can rig up a holographic projection system to send an image to him. That person will be able to talk to him and see his environment. Also, no one but Captain Rydell will be able to see them. Help me move the captain back to the bed in the rear sleeping compartment.

Dillon and Jaroch move to Rydell.

DILLON So, we’ll be able to talk to him, but how do we get him back?

JAROCH Very carefully.

INT. DORM ROOM - NIGHT

Andrea is sitting on Alex’s bed. Rydell is seated across from her on Travis’s bed.

RYDELL She seemed a bit upset.

ANDREA I guess catching your boyfriend with another woman would do that.

RYDELL So, you’re not… What are you doing here?

ANDREA Trying to add a little spice to your life. I didn’t know she was going to interrupt.

RYDELL Do you think she’ll get over it?

Andrea shakes her head and gets up to leave.

ANDREA I’m sorry about this. I know you weren’t expecting me to come over, and you sure weren’t expecting this.

RYDELL (relieved) So you jumped me.

ANDREA You were here, remember?

RYDELL Yeah, I’m just in shock, that’s all.

ANDREA Well, if you want to try again, call me.

She walks out the door.

ANDREA (calling back to him) O captain my captain.

She laughs and leaves. Once she’s gone, Rydell jumps up and searches the room. He finds a wallet sitting on the dresser. He looks into it and pulls out a drivers license.

RYDELL Alexander Rydell. Born January 18, 1974! So that makes me twenty. So this must be…oh no!

He rushes to Alex’s desk and starts rummaging through the backpack there. He comes up with a textbook in one hand and a class schedule in the other.

RYDELL Oh god, I’m in college!

INT. RUNABOUT REAR SECTION.

Jaroch is working at the table on his holographic projection system. Dillon reaches his hand in from to fiddle with something. Jaroch points his tool at Dillon. Dillon pulls his hand away. Carr enters.

CARR (excited) I’ve found Captain Rydell. He’s on Earth.

DILLON That’s great!

CARR Not really. It’s 1994 where he is.

JAROCH Are you certain?

CARR Yes. That temporal anomaly seems to be a wormhole in time and space between here and twentieth century Earth. It opens out to Norfolk, Virginia in the old United States of America. The captain’s at a place called Old Dominion University.

DILLON He’s at a college?

JAROCH It seems so. Excellent work, Ensign. As soon as the projector is finished I will go contact Captain Rydell.

DILLON You! Why can’t I go? I’m at least human.

JAROCH So you claim. Commander, if Captain Rydell is to get back, he is going to need my assistance. Besides, if he has to take a test, who is going to help him? You?

DILLON I was top of my class at Starfleet Academy.

JAROCH That may be, but I have knowledge of a wider range of fields. We do not know what subjects the person Captain Rydell has jumped into takes.

DILLON Fine, go.

Dillon crosses his arms and pouts.

INT. DORM ROOM - NIGHT

Rydell is seated at Alex’s desk looking at his schedule.

RYDELL O.K. I’ve got to go to two classes tomorrow. Calculus and creative writing. Not a problem. (wailing) Oh god, I’m in college in the dark ages! I need a drink. Damn! I’m too young. This sucks! I need…a shower. Yes, that will help.

Rydell exits.

INT. DORM BATHROOM - NIGHT

Rydell enters, starts the water, takes off his robe, and gets into the shower.

INT. DORM LIVING ROOM - NIGHT

The door opens. A figure enters carrying a large, black duffle bag. The head is not visible.

INT. DORM BATHROOM - NIGHT

Rydell showers, unaware that someone has entered.

INT. DORM ROOM - NIGHT

The figure walks over to the bed, puts the duffle down, and opens it.

INT. BATHROOM - NIGHT

Rydell turns off water and reaches out for a towel.

INT. DORM ROOM - NIGHT

Rydell enters in his robe. He stops when he sees the figure unpacking. TRAVIS DILLON turns around.

TRAVIS Hi, Alex.

Rydell screams and faints.

INT. DORM ROOM - NIGHT

Camera is pointing up at Travis who is leaning over camera.

TRAVIS Are you all right?

Cut to side shot. Rydell laying on ground. Travis leaning over him.

RYDELL Dillon?

TRAVIS Yeah?

RYDELL Travis Dillon?

TRAVIS Jesus. I was only gone for the weekend. It hasn’t been that long.

RYDELL Sorry, I’m just a little surprised to see you.

TRAVIS Well, Rachel had to go to work, so I came back early. Oh, my parents said hi. They want to know when you’re coming back up to the house. I guess you were there so much over the summer that they got used to you.

Rydell laughs weakly. Travis claps him on the shoulder.

TRAVIS So, how was your weekend?

RYDELL It’s been a trip.

TRAVIS Did you get your story done?

RYDELL What story?

TRAVIS For creative writing. You have to read it tomorrow. Remember? You were supposed to stay here, away from Trina, and write it this weekend. You two spent the whole time doing… other things, didn’t you?

RYDELL Not the things that you’d expect, I imagine.

Rydell sits down at the computer and opens it up.

RYDELL Computer. Computer.

He picks up the mouse.

RYDELL (speaking into mouse) Hello, computer.

TRAVIS Quit with the Star Trek jokes. Just use the keyboard.

RYDELL I was…just kidding.

Travis looks at him strangely.

INT. DORM ROOM - DAY

Rydell and Travis are asleep. The alarm starts blaring. Rydell jumps to his feet.

RYDELL (shouting) Rydell to bridge. What the hell is going on?

Travis switches off the alarm.

TRAVIS You O.K., Alex?

RYDELL Uh…yeah. I’m just going…back to sleep.

TRAVIS Don’t you have a calculus test in half an hour?

RYDELL I do? Yes, I do!

Rydell rushes over to Travis’s dresser and throws it open.

TRAVIS Those are my clothes.

RYDELL Oops. Sorry.

Rydell closes the drawer and opens his dresser.

RYDELL I have no clothes!

TRAVIS Laundry day again, huh?

RYDELL Laundry? Great.

Rydell pulls some clothes out of a pile in his closet.

INT. RUNABOUT REAR COMPARTMENT

Dillon is asleep on the floor. Jaroch puts down his tool. The completed holographic projection unit is on the table in front of him.

JAROCH Done. Commander Dillon.

Dillon gets up.

DILLON (groggily) What?

JAROCH The projector is complete. I need your assistance to install it.

DILLON Oh.

JAROCH Jaroch to Carr.

CARR (off-screen) Carr here.

JAROCH Please report to the bathroom. I need your assistance in the shower.

CARR (off-screen) Uh…sir. I know you’re my commanding officer, but I don’t think you can order me to…

JAROCH (irritated) Dillon and I need help with the holographic projection unit.

CARR Oh, sorry. I’ll be right there.

INT. CALCULUS CLASSROOM - DAY

Rydell is seated at a desk diligently working. Dr. Cobb is sitting on his desk monitoring the class. Rydell slams down his pencil, grabs his stuff, and takes his paper up to Cobb.

COBB You’re done already, Alex? You only spent twenty minutes on the whole test. Don’t you want to look over it a little longer?

RYDELL Why? I haven’t had a test this easy since elementary school.

COBB What?

RYDELL Never mind. It was…just a bad joke.

Rydell exits.

INT. RUNABOUT BATHROOM.

Dillon, Jaroch, and Carr are mounting the projection device to the wall of the shower.

JAROCH There. Now, I will calibrate the device for Captain Rydell’s brain waves. In the meantime, Ensign, I would like you to contact the Secondprize and download any information you can about Old Dominion University in 1994.

CARR Yes, sir.

Carr exits.

DILLON What about me?

JAROCH I would like you to go away, but I do not believe that I will ever be that fortunate.

INT. CREATIVE WRITING CLASSROOM.

Rydell enters looking at his class schedule. He sees Travis and goes over to sit beside him.

TRAVIS Is your story ready?

RYDELL I hope so, but I kind of threw it together last night.

TRAVIS I’m sure it will be great.

JANET WILCOX enters and walks up to the podium.

JANET Hello, everyone. We’ve got a lot of stories to hear today, so let’s get right to it. Alexander, I believe that you’re first.

RYDELL Here goes. (reading) Captain’s log. Stardate 49752.0. The Secondprize has been diverted to Bytellus III to help with a medical emergency. Starfleet Command hasn’t provided us with any more information, but Admiral Wagner assures me that we are needed desperately. Dr. Singer is beaming down to the surface with Commander Dillon and Lieutenant Commander Jaroch to asses the situation and, if possible, offer assistance…

Janet’s face darkens.

FADE OUT

FADE IN

Rydell continues reading.

RYDELL “Isn’t there a danger of infecting the rest of the crew?” Dillon asked. “I don’t think that it could affect some of them too much, but I’m going to beam directly to sickbay into a quarantined area,” Dr. Singer replied.

Janet put her head in her hand. Her elbow is resting on the podium. She looks at Rydell unhappily.

FADE OUT

FADE IN

More time has passed. Rydell is still reading.

RYDELL “Too bad some stupidity isn’t curable,” Singer thought. Seconds later, she broke down in gales of hysterical laughter. She was overreacting again, but she didn’t care. At least she wasn’t stupid.

He stops reading. The class is completely silent. Janet stands up straight.

JANET That was very…interesting, but you know the rule against genre fiction. We want stories about real people in real situations.

Cut to Rydell looking confused.

RYDELL (baffled) But…This really…Never mind.

INT. RUNABOUT COCKPIT

Carr is seated. She looks dazed. Jaroch enters.

JAROCH I am about to activate the imager. Have you downloaded the information I requested?

CARR Yes, but I think we have a big problem.

JAROCH Besides the fact that our captain is stuck on twentieth century Earth.

CARR Worse. Listen.

She hits a button.

NEWCOMB (voice only) This is the Secondprize. Commander Peter Newcomb here.

JAROCH Commander Newcomb? He is only a Lieutenant Commander in the cultural anthropology section.

CARR I know. But listen to this.

SVEUM When will you and Captain Dillon be returning to the Secondprize?

JAROCH (shouting) CAPTAIN DILLON!!! (calmer) I apologize for my outburst there. I was just…

CARR Shocked as hell?

JAROCH Yes.

Dillon enters.

DILLON (hopefully) Did I hear somebody say Captain Dillon?

JAROCH No. Go away.

DILLON Hey now, I outrank you. You can’t talk to me like that.

JAROCH Go away, sir.

DILLON That’s better.

Dillon exits.

CARR According to the Secondprize’s records, Captain Alexander Rydell doesn’t exist. No Alexander Rydell exists in this time at all.

JAROCH The captain must have done something in the past to erase his future existence.

CARR Then how come we still remember him?

JAROCH The temporal distortions from the anomaly are shielding us from the rewritten present that the Secondprize is currently in. I must go now. Every moment that the captain is alone is another moment that he can screw something up.

Jaroch exits.

INT. LAUNDRY ROOM - DAY

Rydell enters carrying a basket of laundry. He walks over to a washer, examines it, opens it, and starts throwing clothes into it.

JAROCH (unseen) Captain Rydell.

Rydell screams and throws clothes everywhere. He whirls around and sees Jaroch who is holding a PADD.

RYDELL Jaroch! Thank god! Get me out of here!

JAROCH I am afraid we cannot do that yet.

RYDELL Can’t do it! Why not?

JAROCH We are not even sure how you got there yet. Ensign Carr is studying the temporal anomaly, but thus far, she has not learned anything.

RYDELL Then, how’d you get here?

JAROCH I am still on the runabout. We have projected a hologram to you.

RYDELL Will anyone else here be able to see you? We still have to take the Prime Directive into consideration here.

JAROCH No, only you can see me.

RYDELL Well, that’s good, but you guys have got to get me out of here soon. I’m in a different Alexander’s body and a Andrea was trying to jump me and Dillon’s my roommate, and I was dating Trinian.

JAROCH You are dating the Secondprize’s bartender?

RYDELL No! It just looks like her. And there’s someone who looks like Dillon and Carr.

JAROCH Interesting. You say that this Dillon is your roommate?

RYDELL Yes.

JAROCH My sincerest apologies, sir. We will double our efforts to retrieve you, but first you have to do something.

RYDELL Look, Jaroch, this isn’t the time to blackmail me. I need you to save my ass. What the hell do you need me to do?

JAROCH Save your ass. Apparently, you have somehow changed things and erased your own existence. In the new timeline, you were never born, and Commander Dillon is captain of the Secondprize.

RYDELL Oh great. But I haven’t done anything! I’ve gone to all of Alex’s classes, I didn’t sleep with Andrea, I didn’t kill Travis. What did I do?…Trina! That has to be it. She caught me and Andrea together.

JAROCH Trina must marry this Alexander Rydell. You have to restore his relationship with her, or else…

RYDELL The future’s screwed. Yeah, I know.

JAROCH Does anyone suspect that you are not Alexander?

RYDELL What? Oh, I don’t think so. I haven’t really done anything to wrong I hope. Anyway, who’s going to suspect that I’m from the future?

INT. DORM LIVING ROOM - DAY

Close on television playing computer scene from Star Trek IV. Pull out to Travis seated on coffee table. He has his head in his hand in thought. He gets up and goes to the window.

EXT. APARTMENT COURJAROCHARD - DAY

Rydell is carrying his laundry and talking to Jaroch who is walking beside him.

RYDELL Maybe I should get Travis to help me get Trina back.

JAROCH You are not serious suggesting that a pompous incompetent like Dillon could assist you in a matter requiring such sensitivity.

RYDELL No. The Travis here. He’s different. He’s got a lot more on the ball that our Dillon. It’d be great if we had this Travis instead of ours.

JAROCH I could try to reproduce what happened to you with Commander Dillon. That way we would…

Rydell throws down his laundry and turns to Jaroch.

RYDELL (angrily) Jaroch, if we put Dillon here, there’s no telling what kind of damage he could do to the time stream!

JAROCH I know, but I can always dream. I will meet you in your apartment.

Jaroch presses a button on his PADD and vanishes.

Rydell picks up his laundry and walks up the stairs. Pan up to apartment window where Travis is watching.

INT. DORM LIVING ROOM - DAY

Travis moves away from the window and sits down at the kitchen table. Rydell enters.

RYDELL Oh, hi Travis.

TRAVIS Have a nice conversation?

RYDELL You saw him?!

TRAVIS Saw who?

RYDELL (nervously) Never mind.

Rydell walks back toward the bedrooms. Travis follows.

INT. DORM ROOM - DAY

Rydell enters followed by Travis. Rydell puts his laundry on his bed and starts to fold it. Travis stands by the closet.

TRAVIS There are certain people who would find having a conversation with empty air a bit strange. Those same people would also probably be interested in your sudden belief that your computer is voice-activated.

RYDELL I…

Jaroch appears.

JAROCH Do not say another word, Captain!

Rydell turns toward Jaroch.

RYDELL What’s wrong?

JAROCH He is on to you.

TRAVIS Alex, what the hell is going on?

RYDELL Nothing, Dillon.

TRAVIS Why are you calling me Dillon?

JAROCH If he figures this out, it will change the future.

RYDELL Travis, I’ve…got to go to the bathroom. I’ll be right back.

Jaroch and Rydell exit. Travis just stares at him.

INT. DORM BATHROOM - DAY

Rydell and Jaroch enter.

JAROCH What were you doing in there? He is dangerously close to discovering the truth. It pains me to admit this, but this is an intelligent Dillon.

RYDELL I know, but come on, Jaroch. Who would believe that I’m a twenty-fourth century starship captain trapped in the body of some ancestor of mine? That’s crazy.

JAROCH Exactly. Do you want him to have you put in a primitive mental health facility. That would greatly hamper our efforts to salvage this Alexander’s relationship with Trina.

RYDELL O.K. O.K. I’ll try to be more careful. Now, go back to the runabout and figure out how to get me home.

JAROCH Sir, flush the toilet. You were supposed to be going to the bathroom.

RYDELL Right, thanks.

Jaroch presses a button on his PADD and vanishes. Rydell exits.

INT. DORM ROOM - DAY

Travis is seated at his desk as Rydell enters.

TRAVIS You know, those bathrooms aren’t real soundproof.

He holds up a mini tape recorder.

RYDELL I don’t know what you’re talking about.

TRAVIS Nice try. That line doesn’t work in the movies, and it’s not working now either.

RYDELL So, you’re going to have me committed.

TRAVIS No, I don’t think you’re crazy, Captain.

RYDELL Oh.

TRAVIS I would, however, like the whole story.

RYDELL I guess it can’t hurt now. See, I’m Captain Alexander Rydell of the starship Secondprize. I was on my way back from…

FADE OUT.

FADE IN

INT. DORM ROOM - DAY

Rydell and Travis are in the same positions as before.

RYDELL …so you see, I have to save this Alexander’s relationship with Trina or I won’t exist.

TRAVIS Alex and Trina get married? That’s great! So, what do we do first, Captain?

RYDELL Actually, I was going to ask you that.

TRAVIS Well…I would get Andrea to go tell Trina that she jumped you and it wasn’t your fault.

RYDELL (smiling) Sounds like a plan, Number One. Let’s go.

Rydell and Travis exit.

INT. RUNABOUT COCKPIT

Carr is working at the controls. Jaroch enters.

JAROCH Anything new to report, Ensign?

CARR Nothing conclusive, sir. I’ve been scanning the time rift, but I haven’t been able to get a lock on it’s origin.

JAROCH Is it natural?

CARR Definitely not, the wave patterns are far too regular. I do know that whoever created it is doing from back then, not now. Unfortunately, whatever it was is no longer operating. But when it starts up again, all Captain Rydell has to do is find out who’s running it.

JAROCH And then what?

CARR I don’t know, sir.

JAROCH Exactly. That’s why I am here.

He exits.

INT. HALLWAY OUTSIDE OF ANDREA’S APARTMENT - DAY

RYDELL So how are we going to handle this?

TRAVIS I guess you should just be blunt. Andrea’s pretty understanding.

Jaroch appears

RYDELL I trust your judgement, Number One.

TRAVIS Thank you, Captain.

JAROCH You told him!

Rydell turns to Jaroch

RYDELL He blackmailed me.

TRAVIS Is Jaroch here?

RYDELL Yes.

JAROCH What are you going to do about him when you leave?

RYDELL I don’t think that I’ll need to do anything about him.

TRAVIS (looking around for Jaroch) I’m not going to run to the papers or anything.

RYDELL He’s trying to help me get Trina back.

JAROCH (with contempt) I am sure that he will do a wonderful job.

Jaroch vanishes. Rydell knocks on the door. Andrea opens it.

ANDREA Alex! I knew you’d come around.

Rydell enters the apartment.

INT. ANDREA’S APARTMENT - DAY

Rydell and Andrea move to the living area. Travis enters slowly.

TRAVIS Uh…hi, Andrea.

ANDREA (to Rydell) You brought him along?! Sorry, Travis, The offer was only for Alex. You’re engaged anyway.

RYDELL That’s not what we’re here for.

ANDREA (disappointed) It isn’t?

RYDELL I need you to talk to Trina for me. I have to get her back, and you’re the only person who can help me.

ANDREA What do I get out of this?

RYDELL My eternal gratitude.

TRAVIS Mine too. And we’ll treat you to a movie some time. As friends of course.

ANDREA I’m overwhelmed by your generosity.

RYDELL Andrea, please, this is VERY important.

TRAVIS Believe him. It is.

ANDREA All right. All right. I’ll talk to her. I won’t like it, but I’ll talk to her. Now, go away.

RYDELL Thank you, Andrea. I’ll be forever grateful.

Rydell and Travis exit.

ANDREA Probably not grateful enough.

INT. DORM LIVING ROOM - NIGHT

Rydell is sitting on the couch. Travis enters from the bedroom.

TRAVIS That was Andrea on the phone. She talked to Trina, and Trina’s on her way here. I’ll get out of the way, so you two can talk alone.

RYDELL Thank you, Travis. I really appreciate your help in all this. I know it’s a bit strange.

TRAVIS Are you kidding? This is the best thing that’s happened all year.

Travis opens the door. Trina is standing there about to knock.

TRAVIS Oh, hi Trina. I was just…leaving.

TRINA (coldly) Yes, you were.

Travis walks past Trina and gives Rydell a thumbs up. Trina slams the door in his face.

TRINA Hello, Alex.

RYDELL It’s good to see you.

TRINA Andrea told me what happened.

RYDELL (hopefully) So you understand that she attacked me, right?

TRINA Did she remove your clothes for you as well?

RYDELL No, I was planning to take a shower, but I fell asleep. I woke up when she jumped on top of me.

TRINA How’d she get in?

RYDELL I left the door unlocked in case you came over while I was in the shower.

TRINA (unsure) Oh.

RYDELL Please let me make it up to you. Let’s go out tomorrow night.

TRINA I have a big test on Wednesday morning. I can’t.

RYDELL O.K. Then let’s just spend the evening together on campus. I promise to have you home by eight so you can study.

TRINA (smiling) All right.

RYDELL Fantastic. How about I come get you at about five?

TRINA O.K. I’ll see you then, but not before. You’re still on probation, buddy.

She smiles at him, then leaves.

INT. DORM ROOM - NIGHT

Rydell lays in bed reading. Travis enters cautiously.

TRAVIS Is everything O.K.?

RYDELL We’ll know for sure tomorrow, but I think everything’s fine.

TRAVIS Yes!

INT. DORM ROOM - DAY

Rydell and Dillon are asleep. Alarm goes off. Rydell jumps out of bed.

RYDELL Red alert! All hands to battlestations!

Travis shuts off the alarm.

TRAVIS That makes a lot more sense this time.

INT. COMPUTER LAB - DAY

Rydell is walking toward the door with his backpack. He walks past Dr. Porter.

PORTER Mr. Rydell, would you kindly tell me just what you have done to this machine?

RYDELL It didn’t understand hyperthron, so I programmed the language into it.

PORTER But, it’s calling me lesser developed lifeform.

RYDELL Is it my fault that your computer has an ego?

Rydell exits.

PORTER (angrily to computer) No, I will not give you control of the world’s nuclear measles!

INT. ENGLISH CLASSROOM - DAY

Rydell enters unsure if he’s in the right place. Dr. Donask is teaching.

DONASK I’m glad that you could join us, Alex.

Rydell screams.

INT. DORM LIVING ROOM - DAY

Travis is seated on the sofa watching television. Rydell enters frazzled.

RYDELL Why didn’t you tell me?

TRAVIS (confused) Tell you what?

RYDELL Donask! She’s here!

TRAVIS Yeah, so?

RYDELL She’s a Klingon in my century!

TRAVIS Woah, wrong century pal. Dr. Donask is human. She’s married to Dr. Wagner.

RYDELL Thomas Wagner?

TRAVIS Yeah?

RYDELL Admiral Thomas Wagner? God, this century is weird!

TRAVIS Yours doesn’t sound so normal either.

RYDELL Come on. I’ve got to get ready for my date, and you’ve got to help me figure out what to wear.

INT. DORM ROOM - DAY

Rydell is semi-dressed up and his putting on a tie. Travis is standing nearby.

RYDELL Are you sure about this?

TRAVIS You look fine. That’s Alex’s favorite tie.

RYDELL But it’s got a duck on it. It’s not even an attractive duck. It looks like it’s about to get shot or something. Anyway, aren’t I overdressed for just a night around campus.

TRAVIS (dejected) Sorry. I was just trying to help.

RYDELL I know. I appreciate it. Now, you stay here and have a nice evening. I’m off to save the universe as I know it.

Rydell grabs a bag and exits.

TRAVIS My plans for the evening suddenly seem extremely insignificant.

MONTAGE

Rydell and Trina walking together, eating at the food court, walking some more, playing frisbee on Webb lawn, drinking coffee at First Colony, finally Rydell trying to rollerblade in front of Webb.

EXT. WEBB LAWN - DAY

Rydell is trying to rollerblade while Trina laughs. Jaroch appears.

JAROCH Is everything going all right, Captain?

RYDELL I’m fine!

TRINA That’s good. I’d hate for you to…

Rydell crashes right next to her.

TRINA (laughing) …crash.

They look at each other. She leans forward and kisses him.

RYDELL Everything’s great.

JAROCH That much is obvious.

Jaroch vanishes. Rydell and Trina kiss again.

INT. RUNABOUT COCKPIT

Carr is at the controls. Jaroch enters.

JAROCH Try contacting the Secondprize again.

CARR Are you sure, sir? They might start asking questions that we don’t want to have to answer.

JAROCH Do it. With any luck, things are back to normal.

Carr touches some controls.

CARR Runabout Themes to Secondprize. Respond please.

BECK (voice only) This is the Secondprize. Lieutenant Beck here. Where are you guys?

CARR Uh…we got a little delayed.

JAROCH But we should be returning with the captain soon.

BECK Good, the sooner I can turn this ship back over to Captain Rydell, the better. Secondprize out.

CARR The captain did it!

JAROCH I sincerely hope not. That is not really his girlfriend.

CARR What?

JAROCH Never mind, Ensign.

Jaroch turns to leave, but the sensors start beeping.

CARR Sir, the source of the anomaly is active again.

JAROCH Can you locate the source?

CARR I can’t get an exact enough reading.

JAROCH I am going to find the captain. If he can get close enough to the source, we can triangulate its exact position using his brain waves.

Jaroch exits.

INT. DORM LIVING ROOM - NIGHT

Travis is seated. Rydell enters. Travis jumps up.

TRAVIS How’d it go?

RYDELL Pretty well, I think. I won’t know until Jaroch shows up though.

Jaroch appears.

RYDELL Your timing is excellent.

JAROCH Thank you, sir.

TRAVIS He’s here?

JAROCH You exist again, sir.

RYDELL Great. I’m alive!

JAROCH You have to go now. The source of the anomaly is active, and you have to go find it.

RYDELL Where is it?

TRAVIS I’ll just sit here and let you and the invisible man finish.

JAROCH It is located somewhere near the road going by the main part of this campus. As you get closer to it, we will be able to get a better lock on its position.

RYDELL Come on, Travis. We’ve got some searching to do.

Jaroch vanishes.

TRAVIS We do?

They exit.

EXT. WEBB LAWN NEAR CHANDLER HALL - NIGHT

Travis, Jaroch, and Rydell are walking. Jaroch is watching his PADD. They stop.

RYDELL How are we doing, Jaroch?

JAROCH The computer is recalculating…there. Two hundred feet in front of our position.

RYDELL (pointing) What’s that building, Travis?

TRAVIS Chandler Hall. We…I mean Alex and I had physics in there Freshman year.

RYDELL Well, somebody’s doing some very strange physics there now. Let’s get moving.

INT. HALLWAY OUTSIDE OF PHYSICS LAB - NIGHT

Rydell sneaks down the hall toward a room with a light on. Jaroch is beside him. Travis walks past them and continues on ahead.

RYDELL Travis just isn’t grasping the whole catching people off-guard idea here.

JAROCH He is in his home environment. He has no reason to sneak around.

RYDELL Good point.

They enter the room.

INT. PHYSICS LAB - NIGHT

Travis is talking to someone who is busily working on some device. Rydell and Jaroch enter.

TRAVIS About time you got here, Alex.

CARL JAROCH turns around.

CARL Oh, hey Alex. What’s up?

RYDELL I should have known.

JAROCH No. It is not possible!

RYDELL Why not?

JAROCH It’s just not!

TRAVIS So what is this thing?

CARL Well, it’s supposed to be an electro-magnetic telescope, but it’s not working. I thought that leaving it alone for two days would give me time to figure out what was wrong, but… oh well.

JAROCH This…person’s device is causing the temporal anomaly.

RYDELL How?

CARL I’m supposed to be looking at Ursa Major, but I’m not.

Travis looks into the telescope.

TRAVIS It looks like some large clumps of stuff are blocking the view.

CARL They kind of look like asteroids, but that’s impossible. The stars behind the clumps don’t match anything visible from Earth either. Feel free to take a look at it. I’ve got to go get some tools.

Carl exits. Jaroch goes forward to inspect the device.

JAROCH I am not sure how, but this device is looking at our space and time. My best guess is that he accidently invented a nutrino emission chamber with sufficient power to rip the space-time continuum.

RYDELL How’d he do that?

JAROCH He crossed the red and blue wires.

RYDELL So how do I get back?

JAROCH Just jump in front of the beam. I will hopefully see you on the runabout momentarily, sir.

Jaroch vanishes.

RYDELL Travis, could you come over here a second?

Travis walks over.

TRAVIS Is everything O.K.?

RYDELL Perfect. I can go home at any time. I just wanted to say goodbye and thank you for all your help.

TRAVIS Not a problem. Good luck, Captain.

They shake hands.

RYDELL Same to you, Number One. You’re the one who gets stuck with the job of making sure Alex doesn’t think he’s crazy or anything.

TRAVIS I’ll take care of it, sir. Thank you for trusting me with the truth.

RYDELL (smiling) You didn’t leave me much of a choice.

He walks toward the device then stops.

RYDELL By the way, after I leave, tell this Jaroch to switch the red and blue wires.

TRAVIS Will do. Goodbye, Captain.

Rydell jumps.

INT. RUNABOUT BEDROOM

Rydell is lying on a bed. Suddenly, he jumps up and runs out of the room.

INT. RUNABOUT REAR COMPARTMENT

Dillon is seated while Jaroch paces. Rydell runs through at top speed.

JAROCH I guess it worked.

DILLON What worked?

JAROCH Have you paid attention to anything that has gone on here?

INT. RUNABOUT COCKPIT

Carr is seated at the controls. Rydell rushes in.

RYDELL Get us back to the Secondprize now, Ensign.

CARR Yes, sir. It’s good to have you back.

She starts working at the controls.

RYDELL You just don’t know how good it is to be here.

EXT. SPACE

The Secondprize flies by.

RYDELL (V.O.) Captain’s Log. Stardate 49868.2. We have returned to the Secondprize without any other difficulties. I am just glad that the whole experience is behind me. I am home now, in my body, in my century, and on my ship. Life is good.

INT. SEVEN BACKWARD

Rydell, Beck, and Jaroch are seated at a table talking. Trinian is standing at the bar. Dillon enters and walks over to the bar.

DILLON Hello, Trinian. Can I have a Hytellian Rainstorm please?

Trinian turns to the back and returns with the drink.

TRINIAN There you are, Commander.

DILLON Thank you.

He walks over to the table the others are seated at.

BECK …so there were another Dillon, Andrea, Trinian and Jaroch in the twentieth century.

RYDELL As strange as it sounds, Lieutenant, that’s the truth.

DILLON Hello, Captain. Jaroch. Lieutenant Beck. Mind if I sit down?

JAROCH Yes, but I am sure that you will do so anyway, sir.

Dillon sits down.

BECK So did you see any of the rest of us there?

RYDELL Well, not really. I did do some checking in the records though. It seems that Carl Jaroch went on to marry a woman by the name of Lisa Beck.

Beck and Jaroch look at each other.

BECK You’ve got to be kidding.

JAROCH Highly unlikely, sir.

RYDELL Sorry, that’s what happened.

BECK That means that Jaroch and I might be related somehow?

Jaroch and Beck shudder, then leave in opposite directions.

DILLON What about this other me? What was he like?

RYDELL He was intelligent and compassionate and had a sense of humor and didn’t worry about the rules all the time. You would have hated him.

DILLON Yes…hey!

Dillon storms off. Rydell’s head is suddenly slammed down into the table by Trinian.

TRINAN That’s for almost sleeping with Andrea. I’ve been waiting four hundred years to do that.

RYDELL But how? What? You? What? Unnh.

Rydell falls back to the table in a dead faint. Trinian smiles and walks back to the bar.

FADE OUT

CLOSING CREDITS.